TheLeagueMinimum
We’re Coming Back

After a nice little hiatus, The League Minimum is coming back VERY SOON.

If you didnt miss us, you can go shit in a hat.

Otherwise, we’ll see you soon!


Bill Simmons Knows The Red Sox Currently Suck

This team is in trouble.

And yet again…Carl Crawford is NOT in the lineup for Game #2 vs the Orioles tonight due to a stiff neck.

Pathetic.


F*ck Carl Crawford & F*ck The Red Sox

      

As a Red Sox fan I admit that at first this little slide was all a big laugher.

They were going to make the playoffs with ease and September would just be like garbage time in the last few minutes of a football or basketball blowout.

Laughing at first…then giggling…then snickers…now just PISSED.

Carl Crawford has been writing some lame ass diary on ESPN when he really should be working on his game.  

Diary?  Really?  Cant even call it a blog?  What a fucking girl.

And now he’s out of the lineup today with a “stiff neck” during one of the most important weeks of his career?? 

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

I thought JD Drew was on the DL?  This is just insanity.

You can read his most recent post HERE and hopefully you’re able to get through the first 4 paragraphs without throwing up (I couldnt).

But I want to point out a couple things that piss me off.

**In the first paragraph he blames Marco Scutaro for not telling him to slide on a play at the plate this past weekend.** 

I cant stand Marco Scutaro, but Im letting him off the hook on this one. Crawford just threw him completely under the bus here.  Signs of a coward and a shitty teammate if you ask me.

**He says that he hears the boos when he goes back to Tampa.**  

Um…does he leave his hearing aide at home when he plays at Fenway?  They boo him louder there than anywhere else!

**He’s proud that Tim Wakefield got his 200th win.  

BFD.  Wakefield is another story for another time that will take up tons of pages of ranting from me on why the Red Sox deserve to not make playoffs and Wakefield is part of that.

**Ortiz told the team they should be in panic mode but Crawford disagreed.**

Um…you might want to listen to a guy who knows a little bit about being behind and coming back to win a series (2004 ALCS).  Crawford hasnt won shit yet he wont listen to Ortiz, a proven leader of a winning clubhouse?  Get real Crawford.

**He sums up what the Red Sox have to do over this last week in one word: Win.**

NO SHIT CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!

**Crawford is in a fantasy football league, co owns a team with his brother, and has LeSean McCoy, and thinks his team is pretty good.**

How about you let your brother continue to run the team and you focus on more important stuff like saaaaaaay…NOT SUCKING AT BASEBALL RIGHT NOW.

**He finishes by apologizing to Red Sox fans for his shitty season and says “hopefully when we get into these playoffs, I can be the real Carl Crawford that I know I am.”**

Ok…”WHEN”?? Sounds a little cocky to me for a guy who’s sucked ass all year and his team is now on the cusp of one of the all time greatest regular season baseball chokes.  

But wait its ok…he’s sorry.

In the words of George Costanza: “You can stuff your sorry’s in a sack mister!”

Even if the Red Sox make the playoffs this year, they wont get very far at all.  Too many injuries the pitching on these other playoff teams is much better than they are right now.


No Homo Tony Romo

                 

Yesterday Tony Romo left the game with what early reports are saying 2 broken ribs, only to come back and lead the Dallas Cowboys to a come from behind victory of the shitty San Francisco 49ers.

Why is this significant?

Well if you’re a Cowboys fan then its obvious.

But if you’re a degenerate gambler like me it has a whole different meaning.

Here’s why I like Tony Romo (no homo).

1.  I have a season wager on the Cowboys winning 10 or more games.  

So yesterdays victory was nice to see for me.

2.  Yesterday I had a wager on the Cowboys -3 (they won 27-24 and pushed).

Fine with me.  A push is always better than a loss.  But they were one stiff arm away from a td in overtime and Cowboy backers cashing their tickets.

3.  I have Tony Romo on one of my fantasy teams.

Yesterday’s performance flat out won my week for me.  He had something like 11 points when he left the game and ended up with 28. 

So for those reasons, at least this week, I heart Tony Romo (no homo).


The Road To 75k - Survivor Pool Picks Week 2

Last week I lost 2 of my 5 entries in my survivor pool.

I wasnt the only person who lost though as you can see the results here:

            

My two losses were on Denver and Cleveland.

I fucking hate Cleveland sports with a passion.  But its my fault I decided to place my faith in the Browns so I’ll take the hit on that one.

And the Broncos…well they can just go fuck themselves for losing to the friggin Raiders.

Anyway, on the plus side of things I hit 3 games with Arizona, San Diego and San Francisco.  Also about 1/3 of the pool is gone in week 1 which is pretty nice.

Here’s my Week 2 Picks:

1.  Pittsburgh Steelers 

2.  New York Jets

3.  Detroit Lions

And the road to 75k continues on Sunday.


Call The Wambulance For This 14 Year Old Girl

              

So this 14 year old girl from Buffalo was whining about how there were no female hockey players in EA Sports NHL video games.

Um…you think that might be because there are no female players in the NHL?  I dont know, Im really stumped with this one.

GET REAL.

Basically what happened was, this soon to be leader of some anti-male feminist group was crying about how there were no girls in the game.  So her dad told her to go ahead and write a letter to EA Sports.  

Dad probably got home from working a 12 hour shift so that he could continue to buy his daughter useless shit and video games, and then couldnt stand listening to his daughter bitch and moan so he told her to write a letter.

So now when you play the game you can have a female character.  Whoopidie fuckin doo.

Thats not what gets me, what upsets me is that we’ve now taught this 14 year old girl that its ok to whine and complain and bitch and moan until you get what you want.

You wanna know why there’s such a high divorce rate?  Start looking into shit like this and you’ll find the beginning of your answer.


Today’s Talent: Kay Adams

               

               

               

For a long time I only knew what Kay Adams’ voice sounded like.  But boy am I glad I went ahead and looked up to see what she looked like.

Whats not to like about this chick? 

She’s beyond adorable that its just sickening how sexy that makes her.

She’s into sports, not only that but she digs fantasy sports, she hangs out in Vegas, she drinks, she’s got a sense of humor, she doesnt have an annoying voice (if I need to keep going to get you interested in this chick, you might be into dudes yourself).

Not only that, she seems to be like your every day regular chick…just one that is on the radio and has all the qualities listed above.  So not very regular at all.

Needless to say, Im diggin her.

Im a Sirius/XM subscriber and Im a frequent listener to the fantasy sports channel where Kay is the “Femme Fetal of Fantasy Sports” 

Btw…thats MY nickname for her and in order for her to be able to use it on air I will require a weekly to bi-weekly phone call segment to speak with her about fantasy sports and my shitty teams on air.

Soooo…lets make that segment happen Kay!

You can find Kay on Twitter @heykayadams and you can hear her on Sirius/XM Fantasy Sports.


Jaworski Drops S-Bomb During Patriots-Dolphins Game

Ok by now Im sure all of you have seen this and heard it, but its still pretty funny how it just came out (1st video below).

Shortly after that, he apologized (2nd video below).

Whats hilarious about the apology is how Mike Tirico just goes “Ok” and then there’s about 10 seconds of awkward silence.

Could you imagine if Jaws was doing the Raiders and Broncos game when Janikowski kicked a record tying 63 yard field goal?  

I think it woulda went something like this:

"HOLY SHIT DID YOU SEE THAT FUCKING KICK?!?!"



Manny Being Manny Pacquiao?

            

Its a little upsetting to me considering that Manny is one of my favorite Red Sox players of all time.  But Im not a “pink hat” fan so Im not gonna sit here and cry like a little bitch or praise the Red Sox front office for “knowing that Manny was a bad seed”.

Manny was arrested last night on battery charges when his wife called the police after he allegedly hit her.

I have a couple theories as to why he did this…

1. He recently sold his condo in Boston for more than $3million less than he was asking for and less than what he originally paid, so he was pissed off about that and decided it was his wife’s fault.

2. Manny is a true Red Sox fan and was just trying to take away the attention from the current Red Sox epic collapse that is happening.  Even better…this happened in Florida which will probably bump the Rays down in headlines in the local papers, at least for a day.

3. The most obvious…roid rage.

4. Its just Manny Being Manny.


Did My Fantasy Teams Even Play This Weekend?

One word describes both my fantasy teams during week 1…

PATHETIC.

The only plus out of all of this was Ray Rice for me in my ESPN league.  

It was nice to have Kenny Britt on the bench too in the ESPN league, but it would not have mattered.

In my Yahoo! league I was up against Ray Rice and Kenny Britt.

So in other words, I had zero chance.

And just wait til you see who was on my opponent’s team in the ESPN league…

Below is the abortion known as my Week 1 fantasy scores..

YAHOO! Lost 112.76 - 62.52

ESPN Lost 142 - 93 

Note: The guy I played had Brady and Welker who combined for a total 74 Points